How to use Oxytocin to improve relationships and sex

How to use Oxytocin to improve relationships and sex

One of the most important hormones, because it can truly make us happy, is oxytocin. A lot of research has been done on oxytocin in the past, because it is probably the best booster of good erections in men. However, once the PDE5 inhibitors were discovered – such as Viagra, Cialis, and Levitra – most research on oxytocin stopped.

Now that people are becoming aware of the shortcomings of PDE5 inhibitors, more research is being done on oxytocin all the time. I want to draw your attention to one of the most interesting happiness-inducing recent studies on oxytocin.

Oxytocin is produced in the brain and in the testicles in men, and in the brain and breast tissue and ovaries in women.

Oxytocin creates a feeling of trust and happiness and what we might call “bonding”.

I have long been advising men who are dating to build up their oxytocin levels before they attempt to have sexual intercourse with a new love interest.

That good advice is borne out in this study:

Oxytocin during the initial stages of romantic attachment: relations to couples' interactive reciprocity 

This study was conducted on 60 participant couples over a period of about six months. The researchers measured the oxytocin levels of the couples at the beginning of the study and after six months.

They found that higher oxytocin levels were connected with

interactive reciprocity, including social focus, positive affect, affectionate touch, and synchronized states as a couple

They also found that the individuals who stayed together as couples after six months had higher oxytocin levels than the individuals in couples who broke up.

And they found that people with partners had higher oxytocin levels than single men or single women.

As the researchers summarized:

Oxytocin may play an important role at the first stages of romantic attachment.


What to do now?

You are in one of two situations. Either you are married or in a long-term relationship, or you are single.

If you are married or in a long-term relationship, you may want to engage in oxytocin-building behaviors. These include hand-holding, eye gazing, naked cuddling, hugging, making out, etc. Sex kind of counts but not really. Sex has a different effect on oxytocin unless you practice Nirvana sex.

If you are single, you want to take this advice to heart. You want to go slow in a relationship before jumping into bed and trying to have sex with a girl. You want to build up oxytocin levels in both of your bodies first. This will assure that you have good erections, and it will make you more attached and more interested in each other.

This is also probably how couples stay together for decades and decades. Couples that stay together, often called “swans”, probably maintain high oxytocin levels throughout the relationship through a lot of cuddling and kissing and hugging and all that wonderful stuff.

It may sound girly but I assure you it is great masculine advice to build oxytocin levels first and to maintain them through a relationship. It will give you great happiness, more than almost anything else in life.






Matt Cook is editor-in-chief of Daily Medical Discoveries. Matt has been a full time health researcher for 26 years. ABC News interviewed Matt on sexual health issues not long ago. Matt is widely quoted on over 1,000,000 websites. He has over 300,000 daily newsletter readers. Daily Medical Discoveries finds hidden, buried or ignored medical studies through the lens of 100 years of proven science. Matt heads up the editorial team of scientists and health researchers. Each discovery is based upon primary studies from peer reviewed science sources following the Daily Medical Discoveries 7 Step Process to ensure accuracy.
Daily Medical Discoveries has strict sourcing guidelines and relies on peer-reviewed studies, academic research institutions, and medical associations. We avoid using tertiary references. You can learn more about how we ensure our content is accurate and current by reading our editorial policy. To continue reading about Oxytocin and other topics that pertain to men, click here. If you’d like further information, feel free to check out these references:

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