Strangely enough, any man will find this a life-changer…
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From zero to 4x a week: Here’s the secret
I love getting the very most happiness and enjoyment out of life as possible.
It’s a passion of mine and one that has led me to the career I find myself in as I write this piece.
One of the biggest things that brings joy to my life is great sex with my partner, Jodi.
I’m not saying this to brag…
But, so you know what’s possible, we have sex three or four times a week for an hour at a time.
The sex is so much better than when I was a young man that I don’t have words to describe it.
And great sex makes everything better – our entire relationship and my whole life.
I’ve taught thousands of men to have this kind of sex, to overcome performance problems, and to have sex even if their “manhood” isn’t 100% all the time.
But one of the things that often stands in a guy’s way of having immense happiness, pleasure, and satisfaction in his life are his expectations.
Expectations can be cruel masters…making things we would normally enjoy less enjoyable. All by a trick of the mind.
Here’s how it works.
A study based on the Star Wars franchise
This study was done in 2017 – when the movie Star Wars VIII: The Last Jedi came out.
The researchers wanted to see how people’s expectations of the movie influenced their actual enjoyment of the movie.
“Researchers surveyed 441 people before and after they saw the last episode in the popular franchise, Star Wars VIII: The Last Jedi, released in 2017. They wanted to see how audiences’ expectations affected their actual enjoyment of the movie.”
Expectations are weird…
They can greatly influence how we feel about things – even though humans as a whole are TERRIBLE at predicting emotional outcomes.
We aren’t very accurate at predicting what our reactions will be
I think this is one of the most important things to deal with in managing expectations…
…KNOWING that what you expect will probably not happen in the exact way you expect it to happen.
“In this study, about 55% of participants did not accurately predict how the movie would make them feel. Most of them didn’t get their prediction entirely wrong, such as saying the movie would make them happy when it didn’t.”
You might come close…
But it is likely that what you expect in life will not go the way you want…
And, much of the time, the experiences you have will not produce the emotional results you want.
High expectations + disappointing results = disappointment
For instance: If you have high expectations of pleasure and fulfillment, but the experience is disappointing, you are likely to have very low levels of enjoyment.
“As you might expect, people who had the highest expectations for The Last Jedi but were disappointed in the movie had the lowest enjoyment of anyone taking the survey.”
To me, that seems fairly intuitive.
But the reality is that LOW expectations can also produce bad results.
Low expectations + good results = less satisfaction
If you go into a situation with lower expectations and then end up really enjoying the thing you are doing – it can still diminish the ultimate feeling of pleasure.
“…what was most interesting…were people who expected very little from the movie but ended up feeling intensely happy after seeing the film. Their overall enjoyment was lower than those who felt similarly joyful but who went into the movie with higher expectations.”
This one is not nearly as intuitive. But it is a real effect.
The magic of wait and see
When I’m coaching men on how to have off-the-chart sex lives I see this phenomon a lot.
Men who don’t believe it’s possible end up having worse results than those who do believe it’s possible.
But men who expect too much too soon… They often end up being the most disappointed when things don’t go their way.
The magic comes in the wait and see approach.
This approach allows a man to pursue a goal and see what the results bring.
Men who use this approach in restoring their sex lives get much better results and are much happier.
The movie study showed this… And, in my experience, it’s also true about sex.
You CAN have the best sex of your life no matter what your penis is doing right now.
But setting your expectations properly will certainly help.
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